I know what you’re thinking as the April 15 tax filing deadline looms: “If Kim Jong-un keeps rattling that saber, we’re going to have ourselves a nuclear war. NO NEED TO PAY TAXES THIS YEAR!”
First of all, enough with the shouting. Second, I have some bad news: It takes more than a nuclear catastrophe to keep Uncle Sam’s hand out of your pocket. Our taxes have been disaster-proofed and turned into the economic cockroach of Armageddon. In 1998, the U.S. Nuclear Weapons Cost Study Project released a report ensuring that the process of collecting and assessing taxes would resume within 30 days of a nuclear event. The report even details how generous our post-apocalypse government will be: “On the premise that the collection of delinquent accounts would be most adversely affected, and in many cases would be impossible in a disaster area, the service will concentrate on the collection of current taxes.” Just what you want to hear as you dig out from the rubble.